Apparently, Mariah's Type Dangerous Video will contain an "earth shattering" surprise

Here are my hopes on what it could be

Mariah Carey’s MC16¹ era has officially begun with her new single “Type Dangerous.” The song shows off her lower register while leaning into the R&B sounds she excels at. My only note with the song is that it’s not long enough! I want a 9 minute version that just shits on all her exes². However, because of how short the song is, it has perfect replay value. I can’t stop listening to it. And I don’t even have to trick myself into liking it either!

Is the 2-minute timestamp a product of the TikTok generation and a diva needing to adapt to stay relevant? I doubt it, she’s Mariah Carey, but one does wonder.

That being said, these tweets have raised my blood pressure.

Joseph Kahn is a music video director and filmmaker. Responsible for following music videos: Boy (I Need You) (Mariah), The Boy Is Mine (Brandy and Monica), Toxic and Stronger (Britney Spears), Say My Name (Destiny’s Child), Behind These Hazel Eyes and Walk Away (Kelly Clarkson), and so many others³. He clearly directed the Type Dangerous video, so knowing he directed the Boy (I Need You) music video⁴ makes me so excited! However, what the hell is this “earth-shattering surprise”? The adjective earth-shattering was not used by accident. This man is behind some of the most iconic videos in history. Clearly, he has the means to pull something earth-shattering.

• Michelle Obama - I have no idea why this was my first thought, but it was

• All of her exes - My friend Ebony XXL (who was recently noticed by Mariah and I’m still gagging) and I were talking about this, and to be honest, I would GAG

• Eminem - While I don’t think this will happen (or want it to), a couple of people suggested this, so I felt it should go on the list

• Mariah dancing - This isn’t shade, but if mama gave us a real full 8 count ala the Honey video, I would gag

• MC16 release date announcement - I do think this could happen, but I don’t think it's shattering

• A montage of her acting ala the heartbreaker video - Maybe another fight scene choreographed by Jackie Chan again?

• A Janet Jackson cameo - What’s not earth-shattering about that?

• Ariana Grande cameo⁵ - Not earth-shattering for anyone but me, probably

• A relationship reveal with her and 1/2 of Silk Sonic - Eyeroll…but it’s not off the table

• Nicki Minaj - Idk!!!! Maybe they made up?? I need an up out my face pt. 2 no shade!!!

• Bone thugs and harmony?? - I honest have no idea mannn

This is really stressing me out, y’all!! I was already excited, but now I’m nervous! I’m glad he gave us time to prepare for our wigs to be pulled back.

Drop what you think the surprise is in the comments!

1. This woman has 15 albums and all of them are good. Your fav could never.

2. Ala Barbie Dreams

3. I’m only recently finding this out, so he is about to become my next hyper fixation

4. and #Beautiful

5. We also already have the Oh Santa remix